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10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash - Now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash!
Barbie sure has a lot of nice things for a girl who's knees dont bend!! ;)
Naps are for old people, I take a horizontal life pause.
I see smoke on the horizon. God I hope it's Monday burning to the ground.
I think cops should yell "PICKACHUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" before they taze someone.
"2pac's" of "Eminems" cost "50 Cent" thats "Ludacris"
I think cow tipping is probably the most aggressive form of lactose intolerance.
Danger is my middle name.
First name: Avoids
Last name: Completely
( ) single
( ) taken
(x) mentally dating a celebrity that doesn't know you exist
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.......!
Make love, not war. Hell, do both. Get married.
Social networking has become a club. Twitter is the dance floor, Instagram is the bar, and Facebook is the people crying in the bathroom.
There is absolutely nothing funnier than yelling "HE'S STEALING MY BABY!" at a dad having a hard time with his kid in public.
Today, a 12 year-old came up to me and said "May I please have a cigarette?" I can't believe kids this age are already so polite.
If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.
"3 Apples changed the World, 1st one seduced Eve, 2nd fell on Newton and the 3rd was offered to the World half bitten by Steve Jobs."
I wonder if the girls on "16 and pregnant" will come back on 32 and a Grandma! ;)
Grammar is important! Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your Uncle jack off a horse.
"Blessed are the forgetful : for they get the better even of their blunders." - Friedrich Nietzsche.
Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.
Fearless and unstoppable. Simply irresistible. I'm not simple or easy going. I don't waste thoughts. Hence, the tweets!!! http://www.instagram.com/strophicus