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☑ Sept 1994
☑ May 21, 2011
I feel as if my mom is looking down upon me from where ever she is. She's not dead, just really condescending.
Some chick asks me in the elevator "how are you" and I respond with "dandy." It took me another two floors to say "I'm not gay."
I am introducing yoga into my life. Hopefully soon I'll be able to shoot fireballs and punch things extremely far away.
My mom leaves voicemails in Punjabi but Google translates them as English... long story short, my new name is Senator Noblesville.
Bets on who USA goes after next? Carmen Sandiego, Waldo, Bobby Fisher, or Coolio?
I just walked into a wall because I was so intent on opening a Jolly Rancher. This is my life.
My mom calls me and asks "What are sweet yums?" After 4 min of conversation about inappropriate terms for boobs I realized she meant yams.
So it's April 20, 2011 and Skynet DID NOT become self-aware yesterday. I'm quite happy about this.
Wait a second... I just realized I can finally take Charlton Heston's gun!!!
Just got stared down by about 12 cops so I turned, smiled, and said "howdy partners." Non-terrorist status confirmed.
Hi I'm Brian Shaler #nerdpickuplines
Got up at 10am. Charged my camera batteries and now emptying my CF card. Today should be a good day.
Well I'm not kid-tested but I am mother-approved. UX designer, DnB listener, Tumblr addict, and joke maker.