#nowplaying with myself

Its times like these naked in front of a full length mirror that I wish I were black

that outta sight outta mind saying is a load of fucking shit!!!!!

I'm not sure how to respond to your text telling me that you have no signal...??....

Seeing as this dick is mine I don't get all the dirty looks I get when people see me with my hand down my pants

Grown men on scooters stop that shit!!

The only difference between me and the man in the gutter is really only the gutter

if i dont answer the phone its cause i saw its you and i hate you

You'r existence can best be described as 'sparkling water' , enjoyed by some and completely pointless to others.

Fuck hollywood for making kicking down a door look so damm easy...... Bastards!!

I find it offensive that people don't wanna be freaks.

Queen bees are kinda slutty..

Fake it till you make it is one of the dumbest concepts I've ever heard...

Was takin my job seriously today but the fact that this tweet is happening from a meeting means I have failed myself

when did life grow arms to throw all this shit at people

my job only seems complicated because i have no idea what the fuck im really doing most of the time

if there is a woman out there with a bush that resembles Donald Trump's hair piece your boyfriend misses you so please come home

This tweet will not save or change the world in anyway.

Why is it only acceptable to wear your undies outside your pants if you have a super power, its a little elitist.

Nice guys finish first sometimes like in the basement alone watching internet porn