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The cooking channel makes me horny
Your lips tremble but your eyes are in a straight stare
So if you're shaking hands with someone and you scratch them on the inside of their palm that means you want to fuck them
My bra and panties match today *sings "I'm Every Woman" by Whitney Houston*
When you fight with an idiot, you become an idiot
Trying to say "fuck off" in the nicest way possible
I wish I could free boob it 24/7
I feel so goofy
My ideal pal brings wine, watches food network and goes halvies on making snacks with me
I hate emotional men omg 💀
True life: I'm too pretty ...wtf lmao
I'd @ you but you're not on twitter
Really not cool when I'm texting you and it's your girlfriend replying for you
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