This is me, in a nutshell. RT @rcrchoice: http://t.co/MAmiP81b #faithunited #UAWOW

RT @bobbyfinger: Of all the horrifying noises one could hear in a public bathroom, I think the absolute worst is an iPhone's camera shutter.

AWESOME. RT @amaeryllis: AMAZING: Caption-writer goes rogue. Click through before they're taken down: http://t.co/0C0tZnCO

Mine is over there. Doing social justice shit. RT @slackmistress: "Where is your Messiah now?" - @betheboy to Tim Tebow

@saratea @cakemittens totally important. :D

Nestlé wants to patent this natural medicine that has been freely available for 1,000 years.  http://bit.ly/12TwKLE  #nestlesucks

Whoa. This is rad. Wow. RT @earth_pics: Sonic Boom. pic.twitter.com/H7wB6eD2VS

"@theseconddarrin: Let’s be clear. Supporting gun control doesn’t make me anti-gun anymore than supporting speed limits makes me anti-car."

Huh... whut? "@wicce_podge: Drunk tweet"

There's a dinosaur on your porch, Portland.  http://instagr.am/p/Sdxb2cBN6k/ 

Hot Buttered Rum with Cruzan Blackstrap+Smith & Cross+Zacapa. It doesn't suck. It is amazing. Th @ Metrovino  http://instagr.am/p/ScDkabBN04/ 

@heyveronica go get it. Now.

@darth why do you say this? It's super fun! @sarahrodeo

"@irincarmon: "We are greater than the sum of our individual ambitions" is just so great." CHILLS!!!!

@glutton_in_la @maryknabben oh hell.

Thank you, @virginamerica!!!! I can watch @barackobama's speech in the air. http://t.co/vdzQcQgu

I think my car was the victim of a hit & run yesterday. I have 3 notes on my windshield. One is a cop's card. Wtf?

Yes! RT @rexhuppke: I wish lawmakers would start telling me what to do with my penis. Really confused. Women are *so* lucky.

No way, really?! RT @motherjones: Breaking News: Women Like Having Access to Contraception http://t.co/mg85xXtd

RT @mydamnchannel: If Tom Cruise still looks this young in another 10 years, I'll try Scientology. #Oscars #TweetRoast