Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
thanks mom... FWD: happy conceived day! lol!
"I'm gonna kill myself! What is a kayak?!" -Freshman girl in my class
Sundays are the end-slice-of-bread day.
The DMV sent me a letter asking about my recent business with them. They asked for comments or suggestions. I suggested they try mint oreos.
I eat my poptarts RAW
My mother let MATT DUPREE choose the toppings on my Subway sandwich. Guess I'm throwing it away as soon as I get it.
There is something inherently wrong about a huge killer hurricane named after a cartoon squirrel.
There are about 15 birds outside my window playing some stupid bird version of the penis game.
Lyk dis if u cry evertim
"I've gotta work late at the office."
"You work at Toys R Us."
"I promise to listen to Dr. J as long as we get continental breakfasts...and group hugs."
Currently listening to my mom try to explain how Facebook works to my grandmother... It's going EXACTLY how you'd expect.
If you, or anyone, eats toaster strudels without the frosting, then you are a MONSTER.
If I'm walking to class and I hear someone say, "Don't tell anyone," then I automatically keep pace with them and learn their secrets.
Let's be honest, I have overslept and missed the Macy's parade every year since I was 10.
This is not a drill. I just saw a black asian. Repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Hottest girl at the Pokemon midnight release;)
I'm a cat person. And a cat-person. I love Pokemon, Chapplestick, and lego minifigs. Narwhals and bacon, etc. Shout out to @Sabol_Tooth, my better half.