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There's no wifi in the forest but I promise you'll get a better connection
Never stop searching for the universe in you
1920: "May I have this dance?"
1950: "Want to go to the drive-in?"
1980: "What's your sign?"
2013: "Here's a dick pic"
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they're a boomerang. You were in love with a boomerang.
Don't judge Sarah Jessica Parker until you've galloped a mile in her hooves
Marijuana is legalized and Hostess goes bankrupt.. Well played, America. Well played
When did women stop cooking like their moms and start drinking like their dads..?
It's funny how the older you get the more you begin to like the things you hated as a kid. Like naps and getting spanked
I bet hipsters stroke it to 70's porn because its 'vintage'
Time is the enemy and this is how I kill it. Philanthropist, hedonist, comedian, stoner. Studied under the great @autismprime