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@thebenbrooks' (Ben Brooks) recently faved Tweets...
thebenbrooks
Off to the desert for birthday, blowout, bonanza. Hope everyone has a sweet weekend, and thanks for the shout outs! Peace
@thebenbrooks
11
SlappNuttzrongillmoreblobertpiercedbratPunkrockiekambrockSexyInsomniacmathcat345eugemSuck_A_Ducknavanax
thebenbrooks
Him: "Dude, you called me a douchebag."

Me: "No dude, I tweeted you were a douchebag. And told you to follow me."
@thebenbrooks
14
lolamirabellarongillmoreeugempenblethlucyspetNikiWithIssuesrachijantammyphinneyunanythingAmyRangelnjhuntmarktiscarenoPunkrockiecasanoah
thebenbrooks
If you're getting a massage from your friend, you're going to fuck. Or you're in a theater group.
@thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
Granted, it IS hard to make demands on someone when your tongue is so far up their ass.
@thebenbrooks
11
penblethblobertJohn_M15mlb_matosCheVolaygiromideeugemFruvoustammyphinneyrongillmorekdn13
thebenbrooks
Boy, the way Israel ignores America's demands is so reminiscent of the way Iran ignores America's demands. Funny that.
@thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
I don't need St. Patty's day to enjoy a little green.
@thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
In other news, my 'Check Engine' light went off.
@thebenbrooks
8
UncleDynamiteblobertrongillmoreTimeoutTimmyrazorwittedfactualfictiontammyphinneySquishyEye
thebenbrooks
LA is forcing dispensaries to be 1000 ft away from churches. Interestingly, I'm trying to keep churches 1000 ft away from me.
@thebenbrooks
11
BettyLiesJ_EthanGabryyldrongo3Punkrockietalks_in_mathsgneiccoabbiloverongillmorexluciferaxtammyphinney
thebenbrooks
So Tiger Woods drives a Toyota into a Walmart.
@thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
It's my birthday fortnight!
@thebenbrooks
6
NikiWithIssuesrongillmoreSexyInsomniacJezebelTheGreatPunkrockietammyphinney
thebenbrooks
I know it's ubiquitous to lie about your age in LA, but I prefer to keep it real. This Sunday, I will be 387 years old. And I drink blood.
@thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
Love that Rawhide theme, "Rollin', rollin', rollin'...
@thebenbrooks
2
penblethrongillmore
thebenbrooks
Stephen Hawking isn't really on Twitter. I hear he's too "busy". Which is why he knows how the universe works, and I can't find my lighter.
@thebenbrooks
106
smacdonaSexyInsomniacLockworldSuck_A_Duckjoesmithreallybeingtheojuicymorselavi1111carriebentonBlue_CrabtammyphinneykaseandannasmomPunkrockiek2bfkambrock91VIEW
ALL
thebenbrooks
Thank you @stephenhawking.
@thebenbrooks
1
thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
And thus concludes my short set of physics jokes.
@thebenbrooks
8
k2bftammyphinneyTymethiefRickster_01carriebentonSexyInsomniacCheVolayHoget10
thebenbrooks
Scientists found a new black hole but couldn't pass through it. Sign on the door said, "Temporally Closed".
@thebenbrooks
13
k2bftammyphinneykambrockcpinckTymethieflafixtwistedpfisterRickster_01SexyInsomniacavi1111Hoget10lagonkzoblue
thebenbrooks
Suffering fools.
@thebenbrooks
4
joesmithreallytalks_in_mathsmandaHNKbo_buck17
thebenbrooks
This Mommy & Me group needs less Me.
@thebenbrooks
13
BettyLiesawryoneFancyMessblobertIamPinkypaulberluteshealafixxluciferaxTKathermanoinkflapdrongo3rongillmorelexidextrious
thebenbrooks
LOST SPOILER ALERT! It fell off my car around 3:30 today, Hollywood & Highland area. Kinda grayish, sort of dented. Missing some screws.
@thebenbrooks
thebenbrooks
Call me old school, but you can keep the "snap" and I'll take the "fuck".
@thebenbrooks
7
sleepndaddropdeadchrisjuicymorselSnarkToastshelleyluceBettyLieseugem
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