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Portugal. The Man in a Taco Bell commercial is making me feel so torn it hurts
Minsky's five star cream cheese pizza has truly changed my life for the better.
Running for president. Platform: waffles. Plan: replace White House with Waffle House. Free waffles for Americans. That's it.
it's beginning to a look a lot like.. nap time
Why doesn't Scott Disick have his own spinoff show yet ugh
a sports thing occurred and people are upset because it didn't occur the way that they wanted it to. i hear sports things are unpredictable.
I don't get it, frat guys. You have the rest of your life to look like a fat, old dad. Why are you starting in college?
Frat guys have the bIGGEST BUTTS IS IT SOME KIND OF REQUIREMENT TO JOIN A FRAT? ONLY BIG BUTTS SQUEEZED INTO POOR FITTING JEANS MAY JOIN.
"That sucks, dude." -me attempting to console anyone
Men fear women who know their power, potential and worth. They lash out at women who respond with "I'm aware" to their creepy compliments.
don't feel sorry for yourself. feel sorry for other people, because they aren't you.
Imagine me eating a grilled cheese and listening to Drunk in Love because that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm the greatest human to exist.
i can't really get into pinterest because i'm never getting married and i hate crockpots
Took a 2 hour long nap and Lord of the Rings was still playing when I woke up
WE DID THE SPORTS THING
davey narrates my life
I wanna see a movie where they follow the only survivor of a horror movie and document him as he struggles with therapy for years
Vine is probably the worst because it always seems like the best idea when you're drunk
if you talk shit on beyonce, you just don't need to be alive anymore sorry bye
Journalism student at KU from Texas. Enthusiastic about food, pugs, beards and the Internet.