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I'm buying a Fleshlight for my cucumbers. I'm gonna fill it with ranch and let the cucumbers go nuts. My cucumbers need pleasure
I listened to Marilyn Manson for ONE SECOND and my eyes turned totally white ... from rolling back into my head with pleasure
baby is a dracula for milk
"New juice cleanses!" Die.
desperately seeking Souen
[10:36:06] <muppet> I cry when I watch anime
[10:36:08] <muppet> hi
i wish humans were as excited to meet each other as dogs
I had a dream about stalking someone's second twitter account to arrange a chance encounter on the beaches of Rhode Island.
insufferable reddit daughter berating parents at Amtrak station
my parents have been talking about how to sell their wheat pennies for a good five minutes
I'd rather spend the holiday with my synths
Could never be friends with a woman named Madison
GQ is unfathomable garbage
Affordable brownstone apartment of our dreams + affordable Chesterfield sofa of our dreams in the same weekend? Pinch me
After today, I never work in midtown again.
It's 92 degrees out and I've never been loved.