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I love when people start honking in massive traffic jams as if we all just need a little reminder to start driving
Sometimes I'll buy something just to stop myself from obsessively thinking about whether I really need to buy it or not
I weigh myself every morning because I like to start the day being angry at myself
A million monkeys banging on a million typewriters for a million years still wouldn't have made three typos in one tweet
All I want is the ability to do everything and the freedom to not do anything
All the talk of media rigging for two months has just been the preamble for Trump to announce that he isn't going to debate Hillary
Don't be afraid of things that are different from you. Be afraid of things that are just like you because you are terrible
And now, as a patriot, I am going to watch Stranger Things on Netflix
Proud to be a part of this big, ridiculous, diverse, wonderful, and still remarkably flawed country
Hell yes, women
Ideas instead of rhetoric. Policy instead of threats. Hope instead of fear
I refuse to fear my fellow Americans
The fact that a major party nominee is a woman is a victory. It's progress. It's change. Change is scary. But staying the same is scarier
I don't believe that anything changes. I don't believe the future is bright. But I'll always take wide eyed optimism over paralyzing fear
I am not a Democrat. I am not a Republican. I am, however, inspired by this Hillary Clinton speech, and I am proud today to be an American
The conservative platform is basically: "America is the worst it's ever been! Let's keep it exactly the same!"
producer of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. director of Looking for Lenny. founder of Unspirational. very indoorsy
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