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A lot of people say that social media is making us all dumber, but I not think that.
If a tree falls in the forest and there's no one around to hear it, a hipster has bought the soundtrack on limited edition vinyl.
RT this if your Twitter followers give you major boners that are hard.
If God isn’t real then how did beep boopity flip floppity gumbo chops? Christians: 0, Atheists: 0, Bill Cosby: 10. CHECKMATE
99% of teens would rather drink justin bieber's semen than the blood of christ if ur one of the 1% still keepin it real w/ communion RT this
RT if you like butts and like to punch them
if your last name is Blunt, then that's pretty cool
Doesn't matter how hot that person is or how intimidating or how powerful they are. At one point they had explosive diarrhea.
A popular singer dies: America gives a shit. Thousands die in Syria: America doesn't give a shit. #WhitneyHouston #Syria #merica
How many Africans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Six. One to screw in the lightbulb, and five to dance for no fucking reason.
I just told some 12 year old kid that the word "jizz" is slang for "vanilla ice cream". Hopefully that doesn't come back to haunt me.
If you don't know what SOPA is, and is about, you don't deserve to use the Internet. #SOPA #wikipediablackout
these are my twets #420pizzathugz666 hella punch-ah yo buns ~ hotdog eating champion ~ i like french toast