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  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Just watched a dog chase its tail for 10 min., thought "damn so easily entertained" then realized I watched a dog chase his tail for 10 min.

    • 870
    • FAVS
    AlpheymattmanicKentWGrahamredpawn3SFG_fan21TRBLmakerJBSTampaBayMommabaliska2
    • 648
    • RETWEETS
    redpawn3SFG_fan21TRBLmakerJBSRyansGoochriverpig12kikdbakbitchasdfsemiemceej
    abrosenthalGroperClevelandwesjohnson8JiminyKicksItShaunRightNowLisabug74
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Did it hurt when you fell out the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down??....

    • 560
    • FAVS
    TRBLmakerJBSalexmirjxamundsonbaliska2RyansGoochOutsideMetroriverpig12emceej
    • 336
    • RETWEETS
    TRBLmakerJBSRyansGoochriverpig12vancitybarbieTheRealRHBVenusRockHobbitlipzter420chuycisneros74
    joshingsternPointBroke________IRONNUMA
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    I dated a midget once...I was nuts over her...

    • 555
    • FAVS
    TRBLmakerJBSTampaBayMommaaliahchestnutRyansGoochOutsideMetroriverpig12pugvibesericbove
    • 311
    • RETWEETS
    TRBLmakerJBSRyansGoochriverpig12LoudnAliveTheRealRHBVenusRockHobbitIamJickzsheellbii
    WonderMonkey78ShaunRightNowcurlymalloyruslg1
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    How does anything get done at the bubble wrap factory.....??

    • 514
    • FAVS
    alexmirjbaliska2RyansGoochfusedudeOutsideMetroSakura_RaineKaileyReposanigelgodwin
    • 335
    • RETWEETS
    baliska2RyansGoochGigoloGPfusedudeKeren_AmerleyGrantMeMercyCoCo_Natzzredpawn3
    ShaunRightNowbyronblurb
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    If men had periods our commercials would be awesome...

    • 403
    • FAVS
    redpawn3steviethekTampaBayMommabaliska2RyansGoochOutsideMetroriverpig12NASTYBOYTATER
    • 292
    • RETWEETS
    TRBLmakerJBSTampaBayMommaRyansGoochriverpig12ShaunRightNowMrSamookVenusRockHobbitprotolalia
    BCSkimiBlayne
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Our sex was so good the other night I noticed my gf's toes were curled, then I realized I hadn't blown her up completely...

    • 426
    • FAVS
    redpawn3alexmirjCharmingGrumpbaliska2greenleader77green_eyed_dollRyansGoochOutsideMetro
    • 203
    • RETWEETS
    CharmingGrumpbaliska2RyansGoochriverpig12kikdbakbitchnannystephVenusRockHobbitMrNickJC
    jeffreyvanclea1mr_no_pants
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    When someone asks me "Are you stupid or something", I always pick "something", cause it could be nachos or a fuzzy kitty...

    • 363
    • FAVS
    redpawn3RyansGoochOutsideMetroriverpig12kikdbakbitchkneeeecolahhicannotdecide_VenusRockHobbit
    • 191
    • RETWEETS
    caleb_hertelRyansGoochOutsideMetroriverpig12kikdbakbitchShaunRightNowicannotdecide_VenusRockHobbit
    FirawesomeKritzwit
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Drunk people run stop signs, high people wait for them to turn green......

    • 356
    • FAVS
    missymaxwell365tgspeciallauren_mileyNBlaisdaleTampaBayMommagreen_eyed_dollRyansGoochOutsideMetro
    • 153
    • RETWEETS
    TampaBayMommarach_vincenttRyansGoochriverpig12VenusRockHobbitphenabolisverbstMommy_Fab
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    I liked Skrillex back when he was called "AOL Dial-up"...

    • 277
    • FAVS
    redpawn3RyansGoochchimpchillacrunchenhancedGregMysticMayordrugsandbonersVenusRockHobbitTangyToast
    • 142
    • RETWEETS
    RyansGoochPerfectHandleShaunRightNowTheRealBoowipchimpchillaSPEAKEASY2crunchenhancedVenusRockHobbit
    adambation
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    My 5yr old farted by me on the couch. I said,what are you supposed to say? She said, wasn't' me......Fucking awesome..

    • 262
    • FAVS
    redpawn3baliska2RyansGoochOutsideMetroriverpig12kikdbakbitchsailormoonie135blazerchickie
    • 65
    • RETWEETS
    RyansGoochriverpig12VenusRockHobbitbenittto6Favstar250tiz71bjcopasSocial_Mime
    IRONNUMA
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Dr said if I take my meds you guys will all go away...

    • 183
    • FAVS
    redpawn3OutsideMetroriverpig12kikdbakbitchcathe05rinaCrisisLinedoutofink54__bobw1o
    • 85
    • RETWEETS
    riverpig12kikdbakbitchHennie___ShaunRightNowCrisisLinedoutofink54__speknycVenusRockHobbit
    SunnyNeutrino
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    I had to pee so bad I could taste it, need to work on my aim...

    • 200
    • FAVS
    OutsideMetroriverpig12kikdbakbitchVenusRockHobbitTangyToastbadpatrick1PanicRestroomrebranded2
    • 57
    • RETWEETS
    riverpig12VenusRockHobbitBaxterbixMrNickJCOneLastStrangerdenaschmuckernato12939crunchenhanced
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    I bet Captain Crunch has wicked abs..

    • 171
    • FAVS
    redpawn3OutsideMetroriverpig12__kristengilmagreggoodman77VenusRockHobbit_theigirlTangyToast
    • 75
    • RETWEETS
    OutsideMetroriverpig12greggoodman77ShaunRightNowVenusRockHobbiterushurerxbatsflywestOneLastStranger
    stacetoned
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Stevie Wonder smiles all the time cause he knows who farted....

    • 198
    • FAVS
    BareChestyVenusRockHobbitTangyToastMrNickJCsquirrel74wkgndenaschmuckerOneLastStrangerthereverendcink
    • 47
    • RETWEETS
    VenusRockHobbitdenaschmuckerOneLastStrangerPseudoLib________mintygayboyraygt38bryce21aMotivatedMocha
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Twitter is a hell of a drug...

    • 162
    • FAVS
    redpawn3greggoodman77ParentpainsVenusRockHobbitTangyToastMrNickJCKittenMcKayOneLastStranger
    • 61
    • RETWEETS
    ShaunRightNowdenaschmuckerOneLastStrangerPullOutForWhat_PrettyGirl98firecatdaddyTheGreatMiltiniAlizabethAnne13
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    When I hear anything to do with Amsterdam, I automatically think.....POT IS LEGAL THERE!!!

    • 160
    • FAVS
    redpawn3VenusRockHobbitTangyToastMrNickJCOneLastStrangerdenaschmuckerthereverendcinkSgraham231
    • 53
    • RETWEETS
    PerfectHandlei_phreakShaunRightNowOneLastStrangerdenaschmuckersensei_waruiwrongwaybennettKimberlyABettes
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Took egg salad to work. Operation Ass Bomb is a go....

    • 166
    • FAVS
    redpawn3OutsideMetroriverpig12jakeCBR600fVenusRockHobbitazure017kuhncatsCnlAngus
    • 47
    • RETWEETS
    riverpig12ShaunRightNowVenusRockHobbitanna_nicolletteskremineagleMrNickJCbrayomatoyaOneLastStranger
    3sheeter
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Elephant's sex organs are in their feet. They step on you, you're fucked....

    • 158
    • FAVS
    redpawn3riverpig12eDeepikaVenusRockHobbitTangyToastMrNickJCsquirrel74wkgndenaschmucker
    • 41
    • RETWEETS
    riverpig12ShaunRightNowVenusRockHobbitdenaschmuckerBhagwanmotiyaniOneLastStrangerMSWard52naalayak_dude
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    Taylor Swift gave her acceptance speech & "This song is for someone in here, u know who u are" 20 guys shrugged their shoulders...#VMA2013

    • 79
    • FAVS
    redpawn3VenusRockHobbitTangyToastdenaschmuckerthereverendcinkleahlovescheezDumbConfessionscrunchenhanced
    • 110
    • RETWEETS
    denaschmuckerSaldanaEmilianolovemydogduckTheKenyan_LisNicker66LivenLearn_7711RobotSexbotShaunRightNow
  • tpurvis06
      TK-8028 @tpurvis06

    I bet there was one assbag when Lincoln was assassinated that went "SHHHHHHH!!"

    • 135
    • FAVS
    VenusRockHobbit_theigirlTangyToastMrNickJCLakeoconeebldr____OneLastStrangerdenaschmuckerthereverendcink
    • 53
    • RETWEETS
    VenusRockHobbitasianlizardOneLastStrangerdenaschmuckerPaul_kinyaLifesonLeePeartKimberlyABettesDirtMcTurd
    Doyle_McLain
@tpurvis06

@tpurvis06
Pro

Been called the Shock Jock of twitter, but hang around, bet u say wtf??