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I got a white noise app on my iPhone, it’s the sound of people talking about goat cheese omelettes & sundried tomatoes, it put me to sleep
First slum tourism, now unrest/war tourism. Trust us to stretch the limits of our collective voyeuristic pursuits.
Hi, I'm too busy regretting my past to enjoy the present while simultaneously being terrified of the future. Please leave a message.
It's been an hour since I had that tofu and I haven't started wearing flowers in my hair or singing Kumbaya.
I'm having a complete conversation with the only other person in the room. Me.
So which one of y'all want a cute baby?
I don't know why people are against hugging. HUGGING IS MAGICAL LET ME LOVE YOU
scotch goes right to my wiener
Would you block me? I'd block me. I'd block me hard. I'd block me so hard.
"UP WITH THEIR MEDS!"
~ Marie Antoinette, M.D.
I couldn't remember if you're supposed to starve or feed a cold, so I tried to drown it. Now I have a cold and a hangover.
I'm "I remember when Twitter was fun" years old.
"fight for love" is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. You can't strong arm someone into loving you. They love you or they don't. The end.
Sometimes you just have to let people make their own mistakes, hoping that they'll learn from the experience. It's not always easy though.
Hangovers are just fun leaving the body.
♪Take a look/
It's in a book/
I can go aaaanywhere/
When you're poor/
You can't afford vacations/
Explict Content. Do not follow if under the age of 18. No follow holla's. No 4Sq. Get off my porch.