You have to follow @shellyspivey & @saraespivey. These sisters are hilarious. #realLifeSoapOpera so funny...

@saraespivey sure did and right when I was ready to slit my wrists. You saved my life you guys! @shellyspivey @saraespivey

"@flirtylana: You know you have made it on Twitter when people you don't even know hate you." Haha fitting for today!

mwah! Thanx luv! rt that 4 me? I'm sure u have tons of followers who'd wear a shirt that's says "Issuez Crew" ;) @saraespivey @issuezinc

@mrshardenbrook I thought of Steve when I saw this Hahaha he's so funny! http://t.co/cEE7i4P3

Haa! That's SO funny! "@saraespivey: Hey @cmfc99 Have I told you how hot you look today???? Cuz JAYZUS!"

Alrite.What channel is the freakin yule log fire on? I don't have a fireplace I'm gonna try it out. Ambience, ya know? Mood enhancr? I hope.

Uhh on my phone, the word KIDS autocorrects to MORE.....hilarious!! Very funny, Steve Jobs! Oh wait...I have a Droid. oh whatever. #suckit

@shellyspivey @saraespivey wow I gained like 12 followers thanx girlies! NiteyNite

2:15 am white widow bubble bath. Sounds like a plan. What!? I have a prescription. #suckit

@saraespivey @shellyspivey @justpassinthru1 are you effing serious?! I clearly said sisters! duh!

"@saraespivey: @tstrads Followed you back for that! Thx baby!" No problem...thanks for being real! And so entertaining... ;)

Is it too soon to be Amy Winehouse for Halloween?

What?! Plankings not cool anymore? Well I'm STILL going to continue doing it for at least 8-12 hours a day 4 the rest o my life! #sucharebel

I don't want to complete you - I want you to come complete

Look, I don't want to be an asshole about it but feather extensions are fucking stupid unless you are Johnny Depp working on a pirate movie.

"@scbchbum: I’ve never met a lactose intolerant person who shuts the fuck up about it." Omygod so funny..& the comments too!!

My friends @officiallynasty @da8mile want u to buy their new clothing @issuezinc...said Id help spread the word! http://t.co/zjl347iy

The neighbors just brought me a chocolate cake for no reason. Also, there's a piece missing....odd.

How many damn somas do I have to take to stop these back spasms?!