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I mean I like bacon but I wouldn't bite a live pig
'I didn't buy any chocolate cos it just gets eaten' interesting dad, what would you rather we do with it
fuck OFF taylor swift
World happiness day?! For rays of sunshine like myself it comes naturally
It always seems to be steak and flipping blowjob day
honestly love how much you're all rallying round me at this difficult time hahahaha game of thrones is that big a deal
If I had a pound for every 'seen the coke advert, Christmas officially begins!' status on my newsfeed I'd be the richest lil fucker
Ps Jess loves Rolf
Gavin and Stacey you lil cuties
Is there anything funnier in this world than someone puzzled by a fist bump and grabbing the other person's fist and shaking it? No.
i pretty much just live-tweet hangovers. - i'm marginally less annoying in real life.