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PARENTS. Convince kids that teatime's 'cool' by putting the potato waffles on the left, giving the appearance that their dinner's trending
Michael Jackson gives you one of those jackets after he fucks you.
If Carlsberg made lager (which they do), it'd probably be the worst fucking lager available (which it is).
Motown is called such because Detroit grew a moustache for thirty years to raise money for soul music.
Gutted about the Danny Baker show I don't listen to has been axed. Still, it means more time for him to tweet! I don't follow him.
HAPPY JIM WHITE DAY, EVERYONE.
Tulsa's lawyers will be threatening legal action if anyone uploads that shit performance onto YouTube.
Christ, imagine Eden Hazard at the pick n' mix counter.
I notice Mesut Ozil's having one of those quiet games that he seems to have every single fucking time I've ever seen him play, ever.
Did Rowland just refer to Amelia Lily's fans as 'Lil-Lets'...?
Do women take Olly Murs seriously? He looks like he'd clap during sex.