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Cyber masturbation: sending an email you shouldn't have and realising you just fucked yourself!
A friend of mine said,"Onions are the only Food that makes you cry". That was before I hit him in the face with a Watermelon.
I suspect that someone stole my big break in life.
Burry Stander wasn't knocked over and killed by a 'vehicle'. He was killed by a TAXI! They are death on wheels!
2 things. 1: I accidently ran over your cat. 2: It wasn't an accident. #eatme
If u typ lke dis, u r a fkn IDIOT!
If you pass matric with 30% it means you didn't know 70% of your work! And with that you are as useless as tits on a fish.
I HATE when people don't put info under their Bio and Location! I want to know if you are a rabid fuck knuckle and where I must avoid you!
Has anyone bothered to check if the Air Malaysia aircraft isn't at Waterkloof by any chance?
People. Calm the fuck down. Oscar got bail. He wasn't acquitted. Still needs to stand trial. Let's not show our stupid....
Why does Eskom panic when it rains? Half the traffic and street lights are out so they should be saving all the way!
I'm tired, my head hurts, I'm broke and I had to get up at 3am. So fuck off.
If you protect your tweets, I can't retweet them. And that makes me feel like you don't want to share. I might cry. Maybe not.
What the fuck England?! Control your hooligans! You are making Canada look good!
I am in the mood to do fuck all and now I'm stuck at work. Where I do fuck all. Oh, wait.....
I'm awesome. True story. Married to the hotness that is @warm_zombi.