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I don't know why, but every conversation I have with @zoeatrics ends up something like this. http://t.co/Pipl5pHF
.@zoeatrics called me her best friend. Obviously, she was pissed off her face at the time.
"You're semi-psychotic and hormonal. That's the most accurate description of you you're gonna get."
— @zoeatrics
“@defense360: A day for the history books. @unaffectedscorn uses the wrong "your".”
I wish I could say this was false.
@thatzak I try to limit myself to one exclamation mark every 6 months. If I go over that then I know it's time to rethink my life.
My girlfriend is withholding sex because I am not learning C fast enough. I think I finally found the one.
I honestly never realised how useful it is for certain people to assume you’re gay.
@zoeatrics Although it would make for a great reason on the hospital sheet. “Concussion by falling buckets.”
Step 1: Watch
Step 2: Cry like a baby.
Every single time, guys. http://t.co/ryRyc1I2
“well, you're a man, and men's brains suck”
@zoeatrics the feminist, ladies and gentlemen.
I don’t care if the only good thing about Obama is not being Mitt Romney, it’s still a reason to vote for him.
All athletes that got gold were promised a lifetime’s supply of timtams. I don’t know how that will impact their chances for Rio.
@roderickon I transcribed episode 21 of your podcast, which you can have and use, if you want. Or not. http://t.co/wMOtIfsp
I am Max and I like numbers and index cards and books and music and nachos and hot chocolate and frisbee and programming.
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