@userfuckinname's (Lucifer) most faved Tweets...
The way 'Pamela anderson' dresses always reminds me of a bad photograph: overdeveloped and overexposed.
Few days of absolute silence and i got more new followers then usual, Guess my ex wasn't wrong afterall.
Why only dogs? If someone fed me, pampered me,clothed me,picked up after me, and fought for my rights,i would stay loyal to him forever too.
Note to self: Making fun of people's dead mother in dive bars is rarely the start of a sophisticated, meaningful conversation. Rarely.
I only misbehave so dramatically at the end of bad dates so at least I have a story to tell besides "she so was fuckin' dumb".
If it wasn't 4 the author's bio i'd have mistaken sarah palin's speeches 4 a 12 year old's rant-infested cliché-ridden diary entries.
Heard they distinguish and segregate straight and lesbian prisoners in prison! Very hard to tell apart on days they serve fishsticks.
Bad things happen when people are bored.Britney Spears' marriage,Shaquille O'Neal's music career,Twilight Saga, @dalailama's twitter a/c....
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Finding hair in your fuckin food is like finding a bowel-challenged skunk in the backseat of your beloved new car. >,<
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My favorite thing about Porta Capuana is that when I go there I can fart and no one notices cause it already smells like shit anyways.
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I hear there's flying cars. Those Japanese, I tell you. They'll try to build anything they saw in a movie.
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Ghost! Loljk just a stewardess w/ a pound of dark eye shadow on each eyelid,half a tin rouge on each cheek & an inch-thick layer of lipstick
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