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  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    Programming Skills: PRIMARILY RUBY AND PYTHON BUT I CAN USE ANY TYPE OF GEM TO CONTROL ANY TYPE OF SNAKE

    • 3,209
    • FAVS
    jacksdaviesglvnoSHREK_FLEXarchie_debunkerbendahlbergjamesisverycuteshaaybsDukeHoppler
    • 2,980
    • RETWEETS
    sencisojacksdaviesSHREK_FLEXlolface5000MPRodneystevecoymacwilkieLynnWiberg
    EvaGisellemaxlavergnedatamushpete_c_hell_homeractualjellyfishingmarbirdmanBeeStapler
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    i'm not racist, but, *cranes neck to see if anyone's around. keeps craning. head unscrews entirely. out of the hole pour jewels & mysteries*

    • 2,885
    • FAVS
    Spaceman_Spiff1RajExMachinamacwilkieTracksideFireJoughStrixnerdofalltradesSadi_Gracebatinheads
    • 2,250
    • RETWEETS
    Spaceman_Spiff1macwilkieTracksideFirewilldmorganLys_LynBoost_My_LifeDigglersDickLogan_Deckard
    maxlavergneQVT
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    some tweets get big favs but no RTs. why? [camera pans to dog in lab coat high up on a distant ledge. we're too far away to hear his answer]

    • 2,395
    • FAVS
    Pretzel_DoomTweets_GoneWildbhends10CzarCzajkoMrTinMan25cmarqqbrazilianballzjiggynye
    • 1,152
    • RETWEETS
    DagrigzisdownLetdownLizziematthew_jackshug__thiefNickklauseeeesml_rbi_ngepdan_tepovich22
    BeverlyCleary69shruglordprinceframecodefart
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    that's gay as hell dude... [later, in hospital burn ward]: DOES IT LOOK LIKE I KNEW THERE WAS AN EXTREMELY POWERFUL BEING NAMED "HELL DUDE"

    • 1,935
    • FAVS
    AdamNikpmisholobodyDynamicDaegandanieljayzBELLOLOLOLpneumonia_big_rig_rickOlDirtyBoner
    • 1,155
    • RETWEETS
    AdamNikpmismacwilkieTracksideFireMNXVIII_69Logan_DeckarddtipsonNuclearMessagebadtweeting
    deeeebagshruglordMrPapaya__________fart
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    pursue creativity until you're too jaded to enjoy what you loved about it to begin with. keep believing there's some answer to life in art.

    • 1,707
    • FAVS
    RajExMachinasexualjumanjimacwilkiedeeeebagretzlaffmichaeljaxlroseantonyohmanChrisHarrigans
    • 1,176
    • RETWEETS
    asthmattic_kimmmeluncle_quincytwincreatordubjaxlrosejawshwaritcherdMrDeedzzjacksdavies
    DukeRaccoonsunfiltershruglordthe_kizzle
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    halloween is the only day when it's socially acceptable for a girl to dress like a PIT FULL OF SPIDERS. DUDE TRUST ME IT'S A GIRL. GET IN IT

    • 1,636
    • FAVS
    TatumRHuntercliffordpaynedanjan13mhill975ZachamarooerikjpearsonChris_Brummett6coolsexguy
    • 1,092
    • RETWEETS
    JakeQuakeobDuncanVBTheHatIsGoodCrowleyLuranar_vidmarSpacemufffinKTA_JDGpsyzod
    deeeebagvelcrofannypackshruglord
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, knowledge manifests itself in radiant dreams that shimmer like the wild sun.

    • 1,515
    • FAVS
    IceCubeCirca92mr_jack700WhatIDidntEvenElectricEmmylovelyunrealityMeredvthEricaohyeahhpineywoozle
    • 1,095
    • RETWEETS
    IceCubeCirca92DrPollingtonTheManicMediumzoznogecroth7LetdownLizziemacwilkieAmandaProkopis
    deeeebagshruglordweird_hugs________BeeStaplerjrrrd
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    an oscar the grouch in every trashcan doesn't break the canon that there's only one of him, each connects to a central body in the undercity

    • 1,582
    • FAVS
    holobodyfearwigB_Fostingx24goofoffartisteretzlaffmichaeldanieljayzvoidcore
    • 924
    • RETWEETS
    KatttzilllasexualjumanjiIronghaziNorskHausjeffalangorelorne_aliciousdanieljayzBianBuh
    shruglord
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    the average person eats three spiders a year, but as you're about to find out, it takes an entire year for three spiders to eat a person

    • 1,381
    • FAVS
    holobodyeffIuencesquiznomaster420strawxberriesaIgedoniccicadalegsmetavariabelagentkyle
    • 1,117
    • RETWEETS
    quiznomaster420hug__thiefohitslizzyBoost_My_LifeLogan_DeckardLeboza33Rad_i_OtisEeeeevilBeaver
    QVT
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    it's sad thinking of all the dogs in old movies that have died, but even sadder thinking of the earth we fled because of the dogs that can't

    • 1,521
    • FAVS
    Kuskidmiluettekthorjensensexualjumanjit_hillzhopewellcodyBadNewsCentralpatjburns
    • 951
    • RETWEETS
    miluettegoddamnimglamvivisecteurBadNewsCentraldarcibastiaanmacwilkiecameronsadlerlaminatedhair
    sunfilterdeeeebagshruglordmaxlavergneAbbytheGroovydudehugsBeeStaplerrare_basement
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    kinda miss when girls wore those "LOVE PINK" sweatpants. got kinda weird once they got replaced by "EAT BUGS," "FEAR SUN," and "LIVE CAVE"

    • 1,434
    • FAVS
    mr_jack700SpraynardKrugerTripleKanbugpunchdanieljayzamelialikesyoulaminatedhairBELLOLOLOL
    • 944
    • RETWEETS
    TripleKanTotesChrismike_stroutNorskHausKonyMandelaBoost_My_LifeWoodenZachKyl3Sturm3r
    actualjellyfish
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    Goofs: Beavis believes his existence to be that which he experiences rather than the blanket of darkness shrouding the infinity he does not.

    • 1,391
    • FAVS
    KuskidDiarrheaJbanzonesrslyyyyyyyyyyynuke_twoskitroldskogChillE_ConCarneUrplePingo
    • 712
    • RETWEETS
    garbagetweetzbloodreckonermacwilkiesschmaderaychul_hunnysomecleverthingthomjkingtbjwilliams
    shruglord
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    your movie script is a lot like unicode in that it's got a bunch of stupid characters that will never show up on a screen

    • 1,146
    • FAVS
    PsycholystbanzonejaxlrosedanieljayzagentkyleFuckedUpSunsetBELLOLOLOLtimuncouthgao
    • 861
    • RETWEETS
    Boost_My_LifealizardxsgentiluomosiobhanfeddenAsaAnderson12mrkpltJamieScriptsoOSTVOo
    octoqtHermit_Thrush
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    ya, last name spelled: [distant howl] as in far off train, [metallic scraping] as in axe being dragged through quarry, [quiet sobbing] as in

    • 1,256
    • FAVS
    sarahplegicpatkaymunkidfenrisTripleKantyranosexsiirselgavurSuperTangodudeinaplace
    • 621
    • RETWEETS
    sarahplegicpatkaymunhotstoss_kimmmelSuperTangoAdamGrinchyPooBoost_My_Lifepeachclit
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    i love her BUTTE, but only PLATEAUNICALLY ;) [a tumbleweed made of bugs rolls by. they keep still, moved only by wind. are they dead? am i?]

    • 1,256
    • FAVS
    RajExMachinaBalthacsarmetavariabeljackmcgrewNbrewer21graceopppyjaxlroseagentkyle
    • 603
    • RETWEETS
    _kimmmeljaxlrosea_sarcophagusgewtsmeerpsteeviethunderNotCoolOrFunnyeatingthefiller
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    Special Buy Nothing Day Sale!! Great Deals On: [ HOLES | VOIDS | SILENCE | NUMBNESS ] whisper coupon code "hello?" into a disconnected phone

    • 978
    • FAVS
    tylersnotesbig_rig_rickpiersadrianbradcesanekmantonminnickGhost_StratstraitorbabyBR04NN4
    • 786
    • RETWEETS
    Kyl3Sturm3rGhost_StratsjustmarmarnotrevenantCrashburnAlleypatchak21coolhands_lukeSexFerguson
    shruglordHermit_Thrush
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    a dog's nose is his doorbell, don't push it *DINGWOOF* dude what did i JUST SAY [hatch opens on top of dog. a smaller dog pops his head out]

    • 933
    • FAVS
    agentkyleBELLOLOLOLAlwayzFreeMeloroarsopaquesnakealijahwilliams_HammerFist3k_tewb
    • 709
    • RETWEETS
    TotesChrisBoost_My_LifeBELLOLOLOLAlwayzFreethePuddleButtkeeperdesignTylerGaborS4CWernsy
    WeedCoffinSwell_BroTPHD
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    Todd shared a link: "Shit The Omniscient Authority Spire Says." Todd's location was changed from "Drone Warren 72A6-B" to "Reeducation Pods"

    • 1,001
    • FAVS
    mr_jack700KuskidKonyMandeladanieljayzlaminatedhairjamiexcoolxmanbeefhuddlebotandy
    • 624
    • RETWEETS
    thomjkingAntiCrust_horsedreamersteveklabnikckolderupPimoesurynusskecr8r
    shruglordScreamboatiandury007
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    "how creative. the joy division album cover again," - me, sarcastically, to the endless black & white lines pouring out the sky into the sea

    • 1,009
    • FAVS
    krakkenlackinsaravramracheltacobellJuanMountjoyvavyxrayk_voltaireoohwaffleslittlestp123
    • 600
    • RETWEETS
    anthonyvslifetori_elbalazo_kimmmelanimalglueAdamGrinchyPoohalffhumannhans_twittaAbeBroman
    DustinAHarkins
  • UtilityLimb
      bandit @UtilityLimb

    teens building new species of teen out of every available resource. teens of moss and teens of ore, our old weapons can not harm them.

    • 1,008
    • FAVS
    PsycholystholobodycsmplsvelcrofannypackajvollmerjiggynyeLetdownLizziekidfenris
    • 594
    • RETWEETS
    Rydog57LetdownLizziemacwilkieWright_Thoughtscalhendrixevanlannisteramnxietydubisaxel
@UtilityLimb

@UtilityLimb