Hey world, telling a cat owner that you HATE cats doesn't make you cool, it makes you an ass.

This is the slowest McDonalds ever. Getting fat should be faster than this.

I'm going to bookend my birthday weekend by sharing my post on @heybrewtiful on more time. GO:  http://www.heybrewtiful.com/2013/03/a-lady-who-loves-beer-valerie-gibson.html?m=1 …

I also have a good shout out to @peticolas in my post for @heybrewtiful today. My fave local brewery!!  http://www.heybrewtiful.com/2013/03/a-lady-who-loves-beer-valerie-gibson.html?m=1 …

TSA in Denver complimented me on my shirt I got at @untapped_fest . Beer is a universal language.  http://twitpic.com/cqteku 

Trump is going to want to see a long form death certificate.

Now that I have a tv in my bedroom, I could basically move into an efficiency apt. Who needs a living room??

Looky!! My post for @heybrewtiful with shout outs to @goodfriendbg @common_table @openthetaps and @dallashomebrew  http://www.heybrewtiful.com/2013/03/a-lady-who-loves-beer-valerie-gibson.html …

I look around my nice apartment, with my fancy computer, food in my belly, comfy bed to sleep in and think GOD, SELF. NEVER COMPLAIN AGAIN.

I really want to plan a wedding but only on Pinterest.

I'M SO HAPPY I COULD SCREAM!!! RT: @dallassocials: Trader Joe’s to open in Dallas! http://nblo.gs/hp67P

Cool! Fun article about my hometown. Gotta love The Swamp. http://on.msnbc.com/eer59H

I didn't even know Saturdays HAD 7am. My cat felt it was important that he enlighten me. Fucker.

We just spent too much time figuring out the sign language for Jew, Beard, and Motorboat.

All the pregnant women in the grocery must have been knocked up by the guy outside in the Ferrari. He is clearly potent and well endowed.

Laying down in protest. Girl is built like a potato on toothpicks.  http://instagram.com/p/ZgDArMsjT9/ 

Guess what day it is?!?!? #brewday @ The Big LeHOUSEski  http://instagram.com/p/ZgASEssjfR/ 

Firefly marathon on Science Channel? Yup. Not getting out of bed today.

Got the first pour! Yessssss. It's a good day. — Drinking a Lilikoi Kepolo (Mahu) at @flyingsauceradd —  http://untp.it/12B7Elj 

I want a golden ticket.