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People are annoying. And by people I mean my family.
Instagram. But just for good looking people.
Love is dumb.
Only certain things make me cry. Like anyone younger than me.
A state that does not include an Ocean of some kind should never be made the "best state in America". Lists are stupid.
Don't park at Caesars in Atlantic City. Unless you liked to be ass raped then charged 30 bucks.
My friend wants me to do an inflatable fun run. She says it'll be fun cause inflatables. No sentence should ever have fun and run in it.
All I'm saying is my boobies were on fleek this weekend.
I have my own back. Thanks.
Do we really need every fucking photo of your daughter's birthday party posted on social media?
I've had my car for over a year. I wish I knew what some of the buttons do.
I don't want to make love. I want to be slam fucked. - every 40 something year old woman ever
My friends all did shots of tequila last night. I refrained. Today they would all like to die. Have fun throwing up. I'll be at the beach.
*turns on Paul Simon*
Kids- omg mom your music sucks
*turns on Omi*
Kids- this is the greatest singer ever
I dunno. It appears to me that Lebron James managed to find the I in team when you guys couldn't.
I'm pretty sure I just thanked someone for stalking me on IG.
Sorry I automatically thought you meant my boobies when you said, "let's see the goods".
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