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For some, waking tomorrow will be the closes they get from rising from the dead*.
I dare ALL of you football fans. The next time you have sex with your significant other yell “Omaha”.
Son: Dad how good were you?
Me: Son I can honestly say...the older I get...the better I was.
Sooooo Tom Brady just gets caught on national TV mouthing the F word. Yet the NFL had fined Rex Ryan. Now your move Roger G., your move.
I haven't had bacon in a week. Now everything is starting to look like pork.
Whoa, whoa, whoa stop the clock! There's no coffee in this joint!
It's a fact.
Damn it! My wife's to-do list has caught up with me. Screwed again!
My WTF moment of the week: My 80+ year old father got married. Gotta give pops props. He’s gonna live his life until the end!
Manziel’s an asshole but damn the kid can play.
Living life in the DMV.
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