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I DON'T CARE THAT YOU LIKE TEA WHY DOES EVERYONE'S BIOGRAPHY/PRESS RELEASE/WEBSITE HAVE TO PROCLAIM A TWEE LOVE FOR TEA I BLOODY HATE TEA
Today I smiled at an extremely handsome man and we did that rom-com thing where you both turn to look again and he ran over and ASKED ME OUT
I've got a lot of feelings and I need to eat them.
My date just said "Modern romance isn't just candles in wine bottles anymore, Amy. I'm worried that it's Class A drugs and casual fisting."
It's World Goth Day!... on the hottest day in May. Oh, the Alanis Morrisette irony! Ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife, etc.
On a date and I have NO IDEA if he's into me but I keep remembering my personal motto "dick is low value and abundant" and I just don't care
I'm gonna need an intern for 24th May. Anyone fancy some Fashion PR experience? I am very bossy but nice really, I promise!
Happy International Women's Day to all of you treasures who identify as women. Remember that gender comes from the soul, not the genitals!
My date just said "I had a party once and one of Banarama got screwed over the tumble dryer." This is my new favourite sentence of all time.
And they'll be like "GAWD, you're so OLD. Gay people have been literally allowed to get married for, like, EVER." And it will be great.
I hope one day to be proper old, telling young whippersnappers "I remember when gay people couldn't get married. Those were some dark days."
I can't wait until it's not Kate Moss' birthday anymore so my timeline won't be non-stop praising a woman who cares about none of you anyway
Royal pain in the butt. I do social media for booze, boobs and automobiles. Want to resurrect my fashion blog. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.