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Stop giving Amanda Bynes a hard time. Her mom is stranded in a hot air balloon. Let her grieve in her own way.
Lady outside Planned Parenthood holding up a giant cross: a symbol of God killing his son isn't helping you prove your point.
The difference between being romantic and creepy is how hot you are.
People love me for a few months and then never talk to me or think about me ever again. I'm basically the Nintendo Wii of people.
I'm not gay, but I think I know a thing or two about not having sex with women.
Everything doesn't "happen for a reason." The universe is not aware of your existence. Stop being arrogant.
The lead singer of Nickelback is just Nicolas Cage with uncooked ramen noodles glued to his head.
"You'll have more fun in high school, Zach."
"You'll have more fun in college, Zach."
"You'll have more fun in Hell, Zach."
"Ya nasty." - Raven 3:16
The humble pie I made today was...okay.
Someone who dines at a diner is a diner. I N C E P T I O N
Fuck the scale. If you look hot, you weigh the right amount.
Twilight is like soccer. They run around for 2 hours, nobody scores, and its millions of fans insist you just don't understand.
I went on WebMD to see why my foot was asleep and apparently I have cancer of the everything.
Daddy. Writer for @CroptopDotCo, @Playboy, @LiberalBias, @StatePress, other places. Supernova girl on @ZetusLapodcast.
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